These recurring thoughts keep me awake to be honest.

You know there was a time where the plan was for me to come to the states and stay here until November and then move on. As I always do. 

It's November now and to be honest I can't face leaving. So I'm not.

I'm terrified that if I move again I'm going to drift away from some very important people to me. I had friends I'd see almost every day in Spain and now we barely text and half the time when we do I don't know what to say to them anymore.

I can't even consider that happening again, it makes me so sad I just can't ... 

I can't lose my best friend again.